


the rain fell down around me and i drowned (but i will save you)

by aletterinthenameofsanity



Series: all we have is each other (one foot in front of the other) [1]
Category: Power Rangers, Power Rangers Samurai
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Character, Asexual Lauren Shiba, Better than it sounds, Body Horror, But today is not that day, Captivity, Character Study, F/F, F/M, Happy Ending, Holy fuck I wrote over 12000 words in three days, I promise, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jayden and Lauren are co-Red Rangers, Kissing, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Mia, Loyalty, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Mike becomes the white ranger, Mike gets captured, Mike goes through a lot of shit, Mike-Centric, Oops, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, Someday I will write a fluffy romcom story, Spoiler Alert - Freeform, Team as Family, Touch-Starved, Trauma, and I want my badass female Red Ranger, and into such small fandoms, but he heals, but here i am, but it's worth it, but they are all queer, cause dammit they're both awesome, character development bitch, guaranteed, i need to stop seriously putting thought into power rangers 'verses, it's a long story, look at me, rest assured, so the boys' sexualities are never specified, that's a fucking record
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-07-29 20:40:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16271942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aletterinthenameofsanity/pseuds/aletterinthenameofsanity
Summary: It’s all Mike’s fault, really. He was stupid enough to run off on his own instead of waiting for the other Rangers when he saw a Nighlok tormenting some families in a park. He’d thought oh, it’s just one, I’ll be fine, and had charged in with little regard to his own safety. He’d been cocky, overconfident, just like always, and he’d paid the price.(It had been a trap. Of fucking course it had been a trap. And Mike’s never been smart enough to avoid those.)-There’s another disc, sitting in an old cabinet. It’s a weak disc, connected to a weak Zord- the Snake Zord, abandoned generations back for being broken in a battle with Nighlok. It’s a small Zord, underrated during its time even before being broken.And Mike wants to fix it.Maybe Mike isn’t the Green Ranger. But maybe, with Antonio’s help building a morpher and his own effort rebuilding the Snake Zord, he can become something useful to the team again.(Mike gets captured by the Nighlok and is held for months. By the time he escapes, all of the team save Kevin think he's dead and they've replaced him with a new Green Ranger. Mike has to spend months figuring out how to fit himself into this new world.)





	the rain fell down around me and i drowned (but i will save you)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tsukino_Akume](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tsukino_Akume/gifts), [PunkPinkPower](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PunkPinkPower/gifts), [IndigoMay](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IndigoMay/gifts).



> Title is from "Part of Me" from the Dear Evan Hansen Deluxe Soundtrack. (Full admission, I wrote nearly all of this fic to said song.)
> 
> Also, this fic features a cameo at the end from Casey Rhodes of Jungle Fury Red Ranger fame, and his backstory is taken from LoveChilde's fic "If You'll Endure." It's not necessary to read to understand this fic, but it is really good and I highly recommend it. It's one of my two favorite Power Rangers fics of all time, the other of which is "Changing Tactics" by Tsukino_Akume, which also inspired this fic.
> 
> But continuing my trend of posting in the most tiny ass fandoms around…here's my way-too-thought-out Power Rangers fic. This was supposed to just be a two-thousand word story about Kevin helping Mike recover from getting captured by Xandred, then Mike decided to demand character development and a subplot about regaining his status as a Ranger and a friendship with Lauren Shiba and, well, you can see the word count.

_“Meet me on the battlefield_

_Even on the darkest night_

_I will be your sword and shield,_

_Your camouflage and you will be mine_

_Echoes of the shots ring out_

_We may be the first to fall_

_Everything could stay the same_

_Or we could change it all…”_

_-SVRCINA,_ Meet Me on the Battlefield

 

Mike wished he had known that this could happen. He wished he had known that Samurai Rangers could have their connections to the world ripped out of them.

This isn’t Splitface. This isn’t _his_ spirit being stolen- no, it’s something that he didn’t know was part of him until it disappeared. He cannot feel the energy of the forest anymore, cannot feel anything besides his own fragile human body.

Master Xandred sometimes enters his cell, the monster version of a smirk on his face. “I learned it from a demon named Dai Shi, a long time ago,” Master Xandred once says, as he sits there, a glowing, screaming spirit of the forest trapped between his hands. Mike fights, trying to lunge for it, but he can never make it. “It’s a great torment for petty mortal Rangers like you.”

Master Xandred will laugh, or smirk, or shout orders to his Nighlok, and the chains keeping Mike bent over on the ground will retract, sending agonizing pain shooting through Mike's limbs until screams rip their way past his teeth.

Mike doesn’t like to think about what happens next, what Master Xandred and other Nighloks do with his all-too-fragile human body. Instead, he focuses on trying to fight, trying to get out, trying not to breathe in too much of the air of the Sanzu River-

-

It’s all Mike’s fault, really. He was stupid enough to run off on his own instead of waiting for the other Rangers when he saw a Nighlok tormenting some families in a park. He’d thought _oh, it’s just one, I’ll be fine_ , and had charged in with little regard to his own safety. He’d been cocky, overconfident, just like always, and he’d paid the price.

(It had been a trap. Of fucking _course_ it had been a trap. And Mike’s never been smart enough to avoid those.)

-

The Rangers back home think he’s dead. Of course they do- Master Xandred smashed his Morpher, stole his disk, and transported him to a cell on the edge of the Sanzu River. The only evidence that was left behind of the fight are the remains of Mike’s Morpher, which he has never let leave his sight.

The only one who refuses to believe that he’s dead is, of all people, Kevin. Kevin, with his sharp eyes and rod-straight posture and dedication to tradition. He’s the last person Mike would suspect to hold onto hope, months after Mike was taken captive, but the words of the Nighloks who enter his cell in the middle of the night tell otherwise.

Mike hears complaints from the few Nighloks who survive battle, complaints about the Blue Ranger’s quest to find him, the Blue Ranger’s extra drive in battle, The Blue Ranger, the Blue Ranger, the Blue Ranger-

Some part of Mike holds onto hope even as time stretches on. Kevin believes in him, Kevin is searching for him, Kevin _will find him._

Mike has to believe in Kevin. He's pretty sure he'd go insane otherwise.

-

Mike’s getting weaker as time goes on. With his connection to the Ranger Power Grid and the spirit of the forest gone, as well as his continued exposure to the air of the Sanzu River is draining his body of strength.

He has no idea how much longer he'll last.

-

Mike doesn’t know how long he’s been kept in this cell, how long since Master Xandred had reached into him and yanked out his connection to the forest. There is no way to mark the days in this prison- there is no sun or moon above the Sanzu River, just a red, formless haze. The food comes sparingly, and the times he’s tried to count the minutes between the rotten pieces of bread they throw at him have all ended up in differing time stamps.

-

One day, Mike doesn’t know how long after he was first captured, Dayu enters his cell. “There’s a new Green Ranger,” she says dismissively, “I don't know why Master Xandred is keeping your worthless body around.”

There’s a new Green Ranger. They had to get one, with the team thinking him dead and the fight against Master Xandred still going. The Power probably wouldn’t have even rejected whoever it is after Master Xandred ripped out his connection to the forest and the grid- they wouldn’t have even had a way to realize that he’s dead.

Mike doesn’t know who it is. He assumes they got one of his cousins, maybe Alicia or Matteo or Santiago, to fill the role. He hope that whoever it is, they’re good enough to keep the team from falling.

(Mike doesn’t begrudge the team trying to save the world- he just wishes he could be there in the human world instead of wasting away in this cell, various Nighloks taking out their frustrations on him.)

-

Mike can’t fight the Nighloks anymore- he can barely breathe. The Sanzu River air, an almost complete lack of food, and a lack of exercise has caused his body to collapse in on itself. He’s barely more than a skeleton now.

Master Xandred stands over his weak, crippled body and sneers. “Not much of anything now are you, Green?”

Mike wants to spit a comeback at the Nighlok, wants to destroy him for everything that he’s been put through, but he can’t summon the energy to do so.

“Not even a verbal response, Ranger?” Master Xandred spits. “You’re not gonna be much for much longer. I cannot feed off of your misery and fear for much longer, maybe a week or so. I will kill you the moment your fear runs out.”

A small chill spikes down Mike’s spine, some measure of fear that exhaustion hasn’t beaten out yet.

There’s gotta be some way to get out. If he’s gonna die within the week, no matter how weak he is, he has to at least try fighting again. He’s gotta get out. He’s gotta help take down Master Xandred, gotta see the team again, gotta see Kevin again-

-

Someone’s tipping his head up and slipping a liquid down his throat.

It’s water, and not Sanzu River water- it’s pure water from his world. It clears his throat, cleans out some of the Sanzu River air out of his throat. He suddenly feels better than he has in days, and he only feels better when Dayu sticks one of her claws into the locks of the chains and clicks them open.

“I don’t like you, Ranger,” Dayu says, looking at him with a sober expression on her face. “But your team’s going to be destroyed soon, and Dekker needs his duel. They’re going to need your help to keep the Red Ranger alive.”

“You’re helping me get out?”

“I’m helping your body get the little of strength you need to get out of a portal once I open it. You’ll have to stay alert for the next twenty four hours- at some point while Master Xandred is bathing in the River I’ll open up a portal. Also, don’t take this as an act of mercy, Ranger.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Mike croaks.

-

The portal opens and Mike immediately takes his chance, dropping the chains off his body and lunging through the opening. He stumbles out into the human world and into the side of a tree in the middle of the park. He gasps from the impact and breathes his first clean breath in months. He doesn’t have his Morpher or his connection to forest, but the air of this world is already helping relieve at least a little of the damage.

He slumps down onto the ground, unable to hold himself up as he looks around. No Rangers yet, but that’s not a problem. He knows that the Samurai Alarm must have activated back in the dojo as soon as a portal from the Sanzu River opened, so all he has to do is wait. Back before his imprisonment this would’ve been hard, but right now all his body can handle is laying back against the tree and trying to breathe in the air.

When the Rangers arrive, it’s with no Jayden or Antonio, but with the addition of his cousin Alicia and some blond woman he’s never seen before. They're not morphed yet- instead, they're looking around for the threat.

“Where are the moogers?” He recognizes Kevin’s confused voice, and something in him sighs in relief at the familiar sound.

“Over here, hot stuff!” He manages to call, and the Rangers all whirl around to see him.

“Oh my god!” Mia shouts, and then they’re running at him, expressions of complete shock on their faces. Mike grimaces when they get close and he can see their faces- he knows he must look like actual shit, but they’re looking at him like they’re seeing a ghost.

“Mike,” Kevin says, voice strangled, “You’re alive.” He doesn’t seem to know where to put his hands on Mike’s body, unsure of how to help Mike.

“Yeah,” Mike says, “And I’d kinda like it if you could get me back the Shiba House? If you don’t mind. I’ve had a rough few...I don’t know how long I was stuck with Master Xandred.”

“Right, of course,” Kevin says, and Mike recognizes the look of focus on his face as his eyes scan Mike’s body. He then gets into a position to slide his arms under Mike’s body, and a moment later Mike feels himself being lifted up, bridal style. He can’t bring himself to protest. He knows he’s not much more than a bag of bones lately, and there isn’t exactly another good way to transport him back to the Shiba House.

So instead of complaining, he just curls into Kevin slightly. It’s been a long time since he felt anything human and warm against him instead of something scaly and slimy and unmistakably Nighlok.

-

When he first gets back to the base, as Mentor Ji and Alicia are scurrying about trying to help heal him and Kevin’s sitting at his side, refusing to budge, Mia and Emily get to explaining the changes. Voices overlapping over each other in their excitement to have him back, Mike catches most of the story.

The Red Ranger’s name is Lauren, and she’s Jayden’s long lost sister. Jayden left when she arrived, trying to give her room to be the real leader of the Rangers, but after a couple of battles with bad endings Antonio gave up trying to make it without Jayden and took off, saying that neither he nor the team could survive without Jayden.

“He wasn’t wrong,” Mia says, “Lauren’s good, but she doesn’t know us. She can't anticipate our moves as well as Jayden does-”

“Michael Alvarez Akita,” Lauren interrupts quietly, using his full name, and he doesn’t have the strength to move his head to look at her so he just kinda glances in her direction.

“Yeah?” Mike rasps. His voice isn’t that used to speaking in actual air.

“Welcome back,” she says, a soft smile on her lips, and he blinks. She’s not Jayden- she could never be- but she’s not horrible. She’s actually kind of nice. “I’m glad you’re not dead.”

Mike wants to laugh for the first time in months, but he knows his lungs can’t handle it. Instead he grimaces out a smile. “Me neither, Shiba.”

-

Every night, Kevin comes into his room. Mike wakes up sometimes, a nightmare trapped behind his gritted teeth, to find Kevin sleeping in the chair in the corner.

“You know,” Mike says, ignoring the sense of nausea that arises at the idea of sharing a bed with _anyone_ after what happened on Master Xandred’s ship, and Kevin immediately wakes up at the sound of his voice. “You can just share the bed with me, you know.”

Kevin’s head snaps up, eyes wide. “That’s not- I can’t-” He swallows. “That wouldn’t be proper.”

Mike sighs. “I’m long past caring what’s proper. The team’s a mess and I’m a mess. I want to feel comfortable and I want you to feel comfortable and I bet my bed’s a lot comfier than that chair.” Mike doesn’t look at Kevin as he says quietly: “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a guarantee that I will wake up without a monster in my room.”

“I’ll sleep with you,” Kevin immediately declares, voice brokering no argument, and Mike looks up, eyebrow raised.

“I’m too tired for a joke about innuendo, so I’m just gonna take you at face value,” Mike says. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

-

Alicia comes into his room at one point and sits down on the bed next to him. “We’re trying to find Jayden, to bring him back to the team. We need both Jayden and Lauren to take down the Nighloks.”

“Okay,” Mike says, brow furrowing. “I get that. Your battles haven’t been the most successful lately. Why are you telling _me_ , though?”

She bites her lip. “The team’s not strong enough with only three Rangers who have practical experience with the Nighloks. We need more power, more fighters, just _more_ -” Her voice chokes off and Mike notices the way her hands are gripping her skirt so hard her knuckles are turning white. “Mike, I’m not en-”

“Stop,” he orders, unable to bear the guilt that her words cause. He can’t watch her beat herself up because of mistakes made. “You’re the Green Samurai Ranger- you’re plenty enough.”

“I’m not as good as you-”

“If I had more strength in my arm I’d punch you in the arm and then hug you, ‘Licia. You’re a great Ranger in your own right, okay? Kevin’s mentioned your training a few times and I’ve heard the way some Nighloks bitched about your skills. You’re doing good, okay? Don’t compare yourself to me. Trust me, I try not to compare myself to the old me as much as possible.”

Her expression turns sympathetic. “Sorry about the comparison, Mikey-”

“Don’t be,” he dismisses. “Just be the best Ranger you can possibly be and that’ll be plenty enough for me, okay?”

Alicia smiles at him and leans over to press a quick kiss to his forehead, the way his father used to before he died. “Okay, Mikey. I promise.”

-

Kevin comes in the next day grumbling about something Lauren instructed the team to do on the battlefield, and it’s the most un-Kevin-like thing Mike’s seen in the past week, including the whole sleeping-with-Mike thing.

“I thought you always said that we have a mission to listen to the Red Ranger’s orders and protect them from harm,” Mike says, “In order to protect the Sealing Symbol and shit.”

Kevin’s brow furrows. “Did no one tell you what’s happened since you disappeared?”

“Not really,” Mike says, “Including you.”

“Well, a lot of stuff went down while you were...indisposed,” Kevin says. “First off, it turns out that Jayden has an older sister, Lauren, who has been hidden away-”

“I knew that,” Mike interrupts, “You told me that-”

Kevin gives him a familiar look of exasperation. “There’s more than that. Lauren was hidden away not because they wanted to protect the Shiba heir, but also because she was actually the one mastering the Sealing Symbol all along. So that shook a lot of our devotion and belief in the Samurai Code as we had spent the past two years protecting and becoming friends with Jayden, who was our true leader despite the fact that he wasn't the true Shiba heir.”

“Oh,” Mike says, and Kevin nods.

“But before that, some other stuff went down as well. Jayden and Antonio...we’re pretty sure they’re in a relationship. They were all grieving when they thought you died, and the grief had some interesting effects. It drove some people together and drove others apart.”

“But…” Mike says, and locks eyes with Kevin. “You didn’t, did you?”

Kevin raises an eyebrow. “Didn’t what?”

“Think I was dead. When I was-” Mike swallows back the bad memories, the nightmares and the phantom pain. “The Nighloks who escaped you guys- they talked about how you were the only one who didn’t think I was dead, that you refused to think I was gone.”

Kevin looks away from Mike and swallows. “I just couldn’t believe that you could just die like that. Not when I hadn’t-” He looks away and takes a deep breath before continuing. “Maybe it was guilt. Maybe it was that whatever happened, I wasn’t there to help save you from it.”

“I don’t need saving,” Mike automatically says, his pride sparking for the first time in months, but then he slumps back slightly. “Okay, maybe-”

“No, you don’t,” Kevin agrees. “You don’t need me save you. You did that all on your own.”

“I had Dayu’s help,” Mike corrects, but nods. “But you’re right. I do need the rest of you, though. I made a mistake by charging into battle on my own. If I had only waited-”

Kevin’s expression is hard when he says, “It was _not_ your fault, Mike. Whatever happened when you were captured, it wasn’t your fault.”

“Then neither was it yours,” Mike says, and a few moments of comfortable silence pass. He stretches out a hand over the blankets. “Thank you for searching for me,” Mike says, and Kevin offers up the smallest of smiles.

“No need to thank me,” he says, “I know you would have done the same thing.”

And now Mike kinda wants to kiss Kevin, and somehow the idea doesn’t feel that strange. Maybe, someday after he’s finally back to normal and he’s dealt with what happened while he was in captivity, he’ll be able to do that. For now, though, he’s just going to hold Kevin’s hand. And that’s enough for him.

-

It’s about a week and a half (and three Nighlok attacks, barely fended off) after Mike escaped the Sanzu River that Jayden and Antonio return.

Mike, now that the Sanzu River air is gone from his system and he can at least somewhat reconnect with the Power Grid even if he can’t connect with the spirit of the forest, has been healing at a pretty decent rate. He has finally gotten up to walking with someone else’s aid, and when Kevin’s not on a Nighlok call he helps Mike get to the kitchen area so he can sit with the rest of them to eat.

Mike’s in the kitchen with Kevin, Alicia, and Emily when there comes an all-too-familiar shout from the main entrance.

“ _Mis amigos_ , look what I brought home!” someone calls out, and Mike looks up to see Antonio with his hand in Jayden’s. Both their faces are a bit smudged with dirt, but they seem otherwise unharmed.

Emily goes running to meet them. “Antonio, Jayden, it’s great to see you!” she shouts, wrapping them both in a hug.

“Great to see you too, Em,” Jayden says, smile easy in a way Mike only ever got to glimpse on the best of occasions.

“Wait-” Emily tries to stop them from coming into the kitchen, maybe trying to tell them something, but it doesn’t work. Mike knows the moment they see him- their faces go pale, Jayden’s eyes widening and Antonio’s jaw dropping.

“ _Amigo_ ,” Antonio gasps, “You’re _alive_!”

Mike nods and offers up a weak smile. “That I am.”

“But we found your Morpher-” Jayden protests, but Mike cuts him off.

“Master Xandred destroyed it when he stole my old disc,” he says.

“We rescued the disc from some Nighlok three months ago,” Jayden says, and Mike quirks a grin.

“I expected so, when Master Xandred came in far angrier than normal and reports of a Green Ranger started popping up.” Mike purposefully ignores the memories of what Master Xandred did to Mike that night, instead focusing on the vicious satisfaction Mike felt when he knew that the Rangers had done something to fuck with Master Xandred’s plans.

“We got a new Green Ranger when you were still alive-” Antonio begins, and Mike can practically hear the apology forming on his lips.

“It’s all good,” Mike says, “I can’t hold myself up, much less hold a sword.” His smile is bitter as he says, “Not much of a Ranger after months of exposure to the Sanzu River.”

Jayden’s brow furrows. “The Sanzu River?”

Mike nods. “Master Xandred kept me captive on his ship after he captured me.”

“That explains a lot,” Antonio says, and the normally joking line sounds dark in the tone he’s using. His megawatt smile returns after a moment, though, as he lets go of Jayden’s hand and heads forward to clap a hand on Mike’s shoulder. “Good to have you back, _amigo-_ ”

Mike flinches away from his outstretched hand and toward Kevin, then offers Antonio a sheepish smile. “Sorry, man,” he says to the apologetic look on Antonio’s face, “I’m not entirely used to people yet.”

“Wow,” Jayden mutters, and when Mike glances over his face is expression is one of somber thought. “Things have really changed.”

Mike chuckles. “You’re telling me.”

-

Despite having grown up in the most controlling environment of probably any Red Rangers yet, Jayden and Lauren come up with a revolutionary idea for leading a team: they’ll both do it. It’s the first time it’s ever happened in Ranger memory, but they’re willing to try whatever they can to make the team stronger.

From the number of times they come back smiling and laughing instead of with slumped shoulders, Mike can tell it’s working. And he approves.

There’s nothing he wants more than to see this family of his as happy as they can be.

-

Mike wakes up screaming, trying to escape the Nighloks entering his cell. They’re going to torture him, going to touch him, going to-

Next to him, Kevin bolts upright in bed. At first he can’t tell what’s going on, but when he sees Mike flailing and shouting, tears pouring down his cheeks.

“Mike, you’re here,” Kevin says, reaching out to Mike. He pulls Mike carefully into his arms, trying to comfort Mike somehow. “You’re safe, Mike, I promise-”

MIke slumps into Kevin’s arms, exhausted and drained. There are tears in his eyes, a million horrifying memories trapped in his head. “I’m sorry,” he gasps out, “I’ve gotta be stronger than this.”

Kevin’s arms wrap around Mike’s back, pulling him into a hug. “You’re the strongest person I know, Mike,” Kevin says, and his voice sounds a bit choked. “You’re the only person I know who’s survived a single day in Nighlok captivity, much less four and a half months.”

Mike doesn’t feel strong. He’s trembling in Kevin’s arms, halfway to a panic attack. He barely remembers what it’s like to be able to take of himself, much less fight off Nighloks.

-

Mike’s not a Ranger anymore, and he doesn’t know if he’ll ever be again. His Morpher was smashed by Master Xandred, and the current Green Samurai Morpher is being used by Alicia.

He’s almost to the point where he can start sparring again. He’s been doing small exercises everyday, trying to bring his muscles back to almost where they used to be, and he’s built his muscle mass back up with regular food and rest. He’s looking forward to being able to spar again, to feel the adrenaline coursing through his veins-

But it won’t be the same.

For years he’s trained to become a Samurai Ranger. He’s spent the last two years defending the world from Nighlok. What is he if he can’t fight while the people he loves risk their lives on regular basis?

He doesn’t know how to cope with no longer being a warrior, a defender. He’ll be sparring for no reason, practicing moves that will no longer have a bearing on his life. And that fucking grates on him.

-

Mike’s sitting in a chair in the corner of the training room, watching Lauren and Kevin spar. They’re both insanely good- watching them fight is almost like watching the final battles in a Super Smash Bros game, where the animation goes too quick to actually see the moves taken.

Mike, on the other hand, can only get up to a couple of hours of sparring practice a day now, much less fighting at that level of intensity.

“There are other Rangers,” Jayden says, sitting down next to Mike. “That have gone through what you have gone through.”

Mike looks around. “Where?”

“In the other teams. Casey Rhodes, the Red Ranger of the Jungle Fury team is the first one that comes to mind, as Dai Shi, the main demon they fought against, captured him and held him captive for months before the end of their war. Another is Leanbow of the Mystic Force team, who was captured by their enemy the Master and actually cursed to the Dark Side for decades until nearly the very end of their fight. Another is the legendary Tommy Oliver himself, the Green-”

“Why are you telling me this?” Mike cuts him off, voice ragged. His face is drained of blood, horrible memories coursing through his brain.

“Mike, all of these Rangers still managed to fight as Rangers even after great trauma.”

MIke gives Jayden a sharp look. “I can’t be the Green Ranger anymore. You already have one in Alicia, I’m not strong enough, and Master Xandred ripped out my connection to the forest. I can’t do as you are suggesting.”

“Who said you had to be the Green Ranger?” Jayden asks, and Mike’s brow furrows. There’s not exactly a way for him to be anything _other_ than a Green Ranger-

“Tell me, Michael Alvarez Akita- do you still want to be a Ranger?” Jayden asks, and Mike nods, his heart squeezing painfully.

“More than anything,” he admits.

“You know,” Jayden says, “I might have something that could help.”

Mike’s heart skips a beat. “Then show me.”

-

There’s another disc, sitting in an old cabinet. It’s a weak disc, connected to a weak Zord- the Snake Zord, abandoned generations back for being broken in a battle with Nighlok. It’s a small Zord, underrated during its time even before being broken.

And Mike wants to fix it.

Maybe Mike isn’t the Green Ranger. But maybe, with Antonio’s help building a Morpher and his own effort rebuilding the Snake Zord, he can become something useful to the team again.

-

Antonio and he hit a hitch in the road when working on his Morpher, though.

“We have to find you a new symbol power to draw on,” Antonio says, “Now that you can’t use the forest. Is there something that you know well that you could use for your power?”

Mike watches Antonio’s Morpher as the Gold Ranger idly spins it in his hands. He thinks about video games and pizza, fighting Nighloks and waking up next to Kevin.

“Yeah,” he says, “I think I do.”

-

Mike’s hit a rough spot while trying to work on his new path. No matter how hard he tries, his new element keeps being just out of his faltering reach.

He’s resisted meditating in the forest up until now. Despite how cavalier he felt about the forest path coming into the Shiba house, he had gotten used to spending restless nights in a clearing in the woods, the forest at his back and front. He had gotten used to the feeling of growing plants at his fingertips, the smell of wood in his nostrils. The world had always felt a little bit clearer when he was sitting in the woods, breathing deep, meditation sending him close to the spirit of the forest.

Mike hates the fact that over the past few weeks he hasn’t been able to feel the grass, the trees, the wood. His lack of connection to the forest has not disappeared, just like the bad memories and the nightmares and every other bit of damage Master Xandred left on his mind and body. Mike wishes more than anything that he could have that connection back, that he could feel the spirit of the forest again. He hates to admit it, but he _misses_ it.

But now he has to connect to his new path, and the inside of the dojo, while good for concentrating on the martial arts, is horrible for connecting to the natural elements. If Mike is going to become a non-Core Samurai Power Ranger- the first to connect to this particular element- then he has to be able to find his way.

Mike sits in his old favorite clearing, trying to clear his mind.  He is the first of this path. He has no lessons to follow, nothing save instinct and his own experience. He _has_ to get this right, has to figure out how to pursue this element.

Fuck it. He opens his eyes, letting out a grunt of frustration.

This isn’t working. There’s gotta be a better way to concentrate on finding his element than just sitting here uselessly, waiting for something to happen.

What did he do last time?

He thinks about all the nights he’s spent in this forest, about the time he’s spent trying to understand the element of wood. He remembers having to focus on the important aspects that made up the elements of wood- the smell, the feel, the way it grew and provided sustenance to the world around it.

Mike recenters himself. Instead of focusing on the smell of the trees, on the feeling of grass under his bare feet, he thinks about the other things that give his life meaning. He thinks of his friends, of Emily’s face when she speaks about horses, of the way Jayden’s knuckles go white when he's concentrating hard in sparring practice, of the way Antonio always smells like fish, no matter how long it's been since he's visited the ocean. He thinks of Lauren’s tiny smile when he first met her, of how Alicia’s voice shakes despite her growth with the healing powers of the forest. He even thinks of the smell of Mia’s cooking. As disgusting as it can be, he's grown kinda fond of it.

Most of all, though, he thinks of Kevin. He thinks of how easy it would be to lose Kevin. Just one wrong Nighlok blow, one missed block, one exhausted Symbol, and the best man Mike knows would cease to exist. If Mike doesn't figure out his element, then he'll have no way to keep that from happening.

Mike knows what he has to focus on now when he mediates. To be honest, he doesn't know how he missed it when he started this- with the Ranger he wants to be now, there's nothing else that he could focus on for his connection to his element.

So he closes his eyes again, takes a deep breath, and lets his mind flow out into the natural world.

-

It turns out that trying to rebuild a Zord and connect it to a new Morpher is incredibly draining even before the Samurai trying to complete it has been kept captive for months.

Mike has never really understood the word “impossible” before, though, so why start now?

Kevin has an answer to that: Mike’s health.

Kevin catches Mike towards the tail end of one of his healing-the-Zord-with-Symbol-power sessions, when Mike is close to collapsing from the effort he’s putting into the Zord.

“Hey,” Mike offers in greeting as leans against the wall, trying to catch his breath. He still has another hour left of trying to rebuild the Zord, and he needs a quick break before continuing. “How’s training going?”

Instead of answering, Kevin says, “Mike, you look dead on your feet! You’re exhausting yourself,” Kevin argues, “You’re putting way too much effort into this. Mike, this isn’t healthy!”  
Mike shakes his head, pushing himself up and off the wall and onto his feet. “I’ve gotta help,” he says, “I’ve been sitting idle for too long. I gotta do something.”

“Your restlessness is not an excuse to push your body beyond its capabilities,” Kevin tries to protest, and Mike’s eyes turn to flint.

“It’s not just restlessness, Kev!” Mike snaps. He can’t believe Kevin’s accusing him of pushing himself like this just because he’s _bored_. “I can’t just sit on the sidelines while all of you save the world. I can’t let you guys fight when I could help-”

“I can’t lose you again!” Kevin shouts, and Mike blinks.

“What?” He whispers, and Kevin swallows.

“I… I can’t lose you again,” Kevin repeats, voice quiet. “Please, Mike, I can’t-”

Mike steps in and presses a shaking kiss to Kevin’s lips. Kevin leans in, a hand rising to caress Mike’s cheek. For a moment they just stand there, lips against each other, skin in contact. It’s reassuring, having Kevin that close.

But eventually, as all good things do, it has to end. “Please, Kev,” Mike says, leaning back slightly to look Kevin in the eyes. “I know what I’m doing. I- I know what it can be like for someone to lose the person they love to Nighlok. I remember the mess my mother was when my father died in the Battle. And the only way I can think of to keep me from losing _you_ , from Antonio losing Jayden and all of us from losing each other, is to become a Ranger again.”

There’s a pregnant pause before Kevin responds. “Okay,” Kevin says, quietly but not too reluctantly. “Just...take it a little easier, okay? If your body gives out, then all of your progress will be lost.”

“I promise,” Mike says, even if he intends on fudging the lines at least a little bit. They have a deadline with the Nighloks’ increase in strength and he _has_ to become a Power Ranger again soon.

(He can’t let Kevin or anyone else die when he could have been there at their sides as a Ranger. He just can’t.)

-

Mike doesn’t know what color he’ll end up. The Snake Zord is both white and silver, and both are common colors among non-core Rangers. (It’ll definitely be strange being a non-core Ranger, that’s a guarantee.)

Mike knows that as a White or Silver Ranger, whatever he ends up as, he’ll never feel the connection to the forest again. That’s okay, though. He can become something different, something more like Antonio than any Samurai that has come before him.

He’s going to miss being the Green ranger, but if this can help out his team, then he’s all for it.

-

Mike’s breathing hard and there are gray spots speckling his vision, but he can’t give up now. Not when the team needs another Ranger, when there are Nighloks running rampant, when Master Xandred is threatening to take over-

_Just one more symbol._

Mike applies the last bit of symbol power he has to the Zord, and then he blacks out.

-

Mike wakes up with a small Zord curled up on his stomach. When he blinks awake, it starts to move, inching its way across his torso and toward his face.

He grins. “Hey, little guy,” he says, reaching up a hand to stroke its back. The Zord bumps its back against the palm of his hand, apparently welcoming his touch.

“I think we’re gonna be good friends,” he says as he slides a hand under it, picking it up as he stands up. He then carries the little guy out of the training room and toward some of the other Rangers.

“Hey, guys,” Mike says, exiting the main house onto the grounds. Kevin and Mia, who were sparring, look up. The looks on their faces when they see the Snake Zord are priceless. “Meet the newest Zord!”

Mia immediately hurries over to get a good look at the tiny Zord, while Kevin follows, a look of concern in his eyes.

At the sight of other people, the Snake Zord curls into his hand. It seems to actually be hesitant of moving away from Mike, almost afraid of the world, and Mike understands. He knows what it’s like to be broken, to have to reintegrate yourself into a life you don’t fit in anymore.

“You all good?” Kevin mouths as Mia examines the Snake Zord, and Mike nods, giving Kevin a smile.

He’s gotten the Zord to live again, and he’s one step closer to becoming the Ranger his team needs again. He really is “all good.”

-

Mike morphs for the first time on the outside sparring field, everyone watching at a distance. Originally it was just supposed to be Antonio (to make sure his tech worked) and Jayden and Lauren (co-leaders of the team, they wanted to see what they would be working with), but then Kevin insisted on watching and then the girls had wanted to get a look at the old-new Ranger as well and suddenly everyone’s watching from the porch, some of them with popcorn bowls in their hands.

Mike takes a deep breath and raises his new, strange looking Morpher in the air. Then he swipes the _kanji_ for _life_ into the air using his Morpher, transforming into the White Samurai Ranger.

“Holy shit,” he hears Mia swear, and he grins as the Power Grid’s energy flows into his veins. He’s more energized than he has been since probably before he was first captured, and though the Power feels slightly different now that it’s being channeled through the Life path rather than the Forest path, it’s a welcome gift.

“”Holy shit”’s right,” Mike says, smirking. He feels a lot more like the self he used to be, confident and strong and ready to save the world. It’s a good, familiar feeling that he doesn’t want to stop anytime soon.

Then, of course, Mentor Ji has to ruin the moment. “There is no such thing as a White Samurai,” Mentor Ji says as he steps down off of the porch, but before Mike even has a chance at replying Antonio sets down his popcorn and stands.

“There wasn’t exactly a Gold Samurai either,” Antonio says, practically daring Ji to argue with him, “And yet here I am.”

“So your symbol is life?” Lauren asks, and Mike nods.

“The forest path shut down for me when Master Xandred ripped the connection out of my spirit,” he says, and to his pleasant surprise he only feels a twinge of pain when he says that. “Antonio suggested something similar when we were working on my Morpher, and so I went searching through the old scrolls for similiar paths. When I looked at the couple of scrolls we had on the Snake Zord, I figured out that both “life” and “poisonous” forces are commonly associated with snakes. And it’s not too different to go from the plant path- the path of herbs and the like- to a life or poison path.”

“How’d you pick which path to go with?” Jayden asks.

Mike demorphs, feeling a sense of loss as the Power leaves him. He looks over at Kevin. “I thought about what I cared about, what could give me a sense of power. And keeping the people I care about alive gives me strength to fight.”

“Good idea,” Kevin says, a proud smile on his lips.

* * *

(“The Samurai bloodlines have to be continued,” Lauren says to Mia, a frown on her face as she watches everyone curled up on the couches in front of the TV. It’s the one space in the common areas of the house that isn’t as minimalistic at possible- instead, the modern Rangers have all insisted on bringing in soft furniture and plenty of pillows and blankets for comfort between battles and during Off Days. They’ve had enough days when Rangers have been severely injured and needed a place to rest where they could be easily kept an eye on while others were training, and this seemed the easiest solution. Currently, Jayden and Antonio are squished together on the recliner, Antonio practically in Jayden’s lap, while Mike and Kevin are curled up on the couch together. Emily’s laying on the ground, pillows under her, while Alicia’s snagged the other recliner. “This isn’t proper.”

“I don’t think either Jayden or Mike is willing or able to give up their respective boyfriends, Lauren,” Mia says as she slices carrots for dinner, her tone not harsh but just matter-of-fact. “And I don’t think you’ll be able to pry Antonio or Kevin away either. Trying to split them up would be severely damaging not only to them as separate persons, but to the team as well.”

Lauren watches the boys for a few moments. Mike, despite having finally fought in his first battle since his escape from the Nighlok, is clearly not back to the no-fucks-given jokester the team described him as. He’s curled into Kevin’s side on the couch, Kevin’s arm around his shoulders.

“And as an actual point of the Code, Kevin would be your only actual problem when it comes to continuing bloodlines, anyway,” Mia adds. “Mike and Antonio are both the only Samurai of their respective paths, and Jayden has you. With Alicia as the Green Ranger, Kevin’s the only one who would really have to continue the actual bloodline.”

Lauren imagines having to be the one to carry on the Shiba bloodline and hesitates. She’s always assumed that with Jayden, she’d be able to never marry at all. She’s never wanted to engage in intercourse with any of the few people she’s met in her training, and it still doesn’t sound appealing to her now. The idea of doing anything intimate doesn’t quite square with the isolation she’s been in her entire life, or the lack of response from her lower regions when the idea is mentioned.

“I don’t think I want a husband,” Lauren says, and then flinches. “I've never said that aloud before.”

“Don’t feel bad,” Mia says, “Emily and Alicia are the only straight people in this house.”

Lauren raises an eyebrow. “Does that include you?”

Mia offers her a smile. “Girls are rather pretty, what can I say?” Then she sobers up. “But back to them. Lauren, I know you’ve been trained in the Samurai way just as much as Jayden was before we met him. You were raised with the belief that honor and loyalty to the Samurai Code was more important than anything else in the world. But we’ve learned over the years that we've been fighting that there are things that are more important than the Samurai Code. We’re not just Samurai- we’re Power Rangers. We fight for the world and the people we love. If you take away the people we love, then you take away our reasons to fight.”

Lauren can’t comprehend a life without honor, where the most important thing isn’t loyalty to the Samurai Code. She can barely understand her own lack of desire for a husband, despite it being an integral part of her. She knows the rules- she’s trained for this her whole life.

But as she looks at her brother, squeezed into a recliner with his boyfriend, and Mike, nearly asleep with his head on Kevin’s shoulder, she finds herself understanding, if only a little, why they’d be willing to cross the Samurai Council for love.)

* * *

They fight battle after battle. For the first couple, Mike finds himself a bit behind the others. He finds himself getting blocked not just by his muscles’ unfamiliarity with battle, but also by Kevin’s attempts to try and protect Mike during battle. Mike doesn’t realize it at first, just thinking it himself being off-kilter from so long out of practice, but then he notices the fact that Kevin keeps leaving his own weak spots vulnerable.

And Mike gets _furious._ He became the White Ranger to keep Kevin out of danger, not to let Kevin continue risking his life in an effort to try and protect him.

“You promised to let me try to take care of myself!” Mike shouts as soon as they enter the dojo after yet another battle where Kevin got in Mike’s way in an effort to protect him. He knows that the team is listening, but he can’t bring himself to care. Kevin is doing the exact thing Mike had been trying to prevent. “And yet you’re _risking your life_ trying to protect me in battle-”

“It is my job as your teammate to guard your weak spots-” Kevin argues as he follows Mike down the hallway.

“Your _job_ as my teammate is to fight by my side, not to leave yourself vulnerable in some misguided attempt to protect me from battle. I am a _Power Ranger_ , Kevin. I can protect myself in battle.”

They get into Mike’s bedroom- _their_ bedroom now, to be honest- and by this point, Mike has managed to lower his voice a bit.

“Kevin, I’m not breakable. You have to trust me, okay? Trust that I can defend myself, otherwise I’m gonna spend battles off-balance trying to compensate for your hovering.”

“I’m sorry,” Kevin says, sounding disappointed in himself. “I’m just a bit paranoid, okay? After the last time…” Kevin’s voice trails off, but Mike has already caught his meaning. He realizes what’s been holding up Kevin, and his anger dissolves, replaced by guilt. He’d been yelling at Kevin for being human, for being worried over him.

“You blame yourself for me getting captured, don’t you?” Mike asks, voice softened. “Kevin, I-”

“I trained for years leading up to becoming a Samurai,” Kevin interrupts, and Mike’s jaw snaps shut. The look in Kevin’s eyes is intense and his words personal. “From the day I turned six, the only thing that mattered was dedicating myself to being the best. I became a swimmer as I needed a way to keep my muscles and focus honed and swimming was a sport I both enjoyed and knew I had a talent for. I became the best trained swimmer and Samurai I could, training day in and day out. I didn’t have a social life, or friends, or free time. There was just training.

And then I got here, and I met you. You with your infuriating lack of dedication to tradition- I hated it at first. You were everything I had been raised not to be. Then you just sauntered in and flipped my world on its axis. You taught me to care about more than just training. The thing is, though, I think in the time I spent with you I let my training slip. I wasn’t as dedicated, wasn’t as focused. And then I wasn’t there when you were captured, and…”

Mike feels guilt wash through his veins. The idea that Kevin has been harboring this misplaced guilt, probably since the very day Mike was captured by Master Xandred- he hates it.

“I ran into that battle thinking I could take that Nighlok, Kev,” Mike says, “I didn’t think about calling you guys because I was cocky and overconfident. I thought I’d learned enough in my time here, but I was wrong. Getting captured by Master Xandred, escaping, and then training over the past few months- that has taught me the power of caution and hard work. I didn’t become the White Ranger by doing anything stupid. I became the White Ranger because I learned to trust others- Antonio, Jayden, Alicia, you- and grew strong enough to use the Power again. But now I can’t do my best job of being the White Ranger, because I keep getting distracted in battle. Kevin, the only way I can be the best White Ranger possible is to know that you’re fighting at your best, using all that dedication I fell for in order to be the best Samurai you can. And focusing on me means your attention is split.”

“Since when did you get so smart?” Kevin asks, and Mike can actually see the tears in his eyes.

“Since I started hanging around you, you big nerd.”

Kevin’s eyes narrow. “Nerd?”

“You know it’s true,” Mike says, starting to feel more at ease with the situation. Flirting and banter feel far more normal than the heavy conversations he and Kevin have been engaging in lately.

“I’d have to argue with that,” Kevin says, allowing himself to be drawn into this easy tossing of insults that reminds Mike of the time before his capture, when they were nothing more than friends with unrecognized crushes on each other. “I’m technically more of a jock.”

“Fine. Teacher’s pet, then.” Mike smirks. “And it obviously hasn’t changed, has it?”

“I’m not as much of a teacher’s pet as I used to be,” Kevin points out. “Or have you not thought about how I handle Lauren and Jayden now compared to when I first joined the team?”

“Touché,” Mike acquiesces, preferring to agree with Kevin rather than argue with him anymore. He doesn’t want to go back to the fight they just had- instead, he just wants to talk with Kevin, to somehow exist for a few moments in a world where they weren't driven together by Mike's nightmares from being held captive in hell itself.

Kevin doesn’t seem to share the same feelings, though. “But back to our conversation- I promise to try not to focus on you during battle and to trust that you can protect yourself,” Kevin says, “If you can promise me to make it out of this war alive.”

“I can’t-” Mike starts, thinking about how easy it would be to fall in battle, and then swallows. He focuses on Kevin’s face, on the dip of his nose, the curve of his jawline, and the warmth of his dark eyes. He thinks about the stern expression he normally wears in training and the small smile he sometimes directs at Mike when he thinks no one’s looking. He thinks of Kevin’s fingers gripping the handle of a sword, Kevin’s lips against his, Kevin’s face softened in sleep. He imagines what it would be like to lose that because Kevin was too focused on him to block a Nighlok’s blow in battle. “I promise,” he says, and then leans in to kiss Kevin.

He’ll promise anything if that’s what it takes to get Kevin through this war.

-

Lauren catches Mike after his conversation with Kevin, when he’s in the middle of grabbing a snack. Mia’s supposed to be cooking for dinner and he wants to load up on food now so he doesn’t have to eat much at dinner.

“Mike,” she says, and he notices that even after months of working together she’s still kind of stiff, keeping her hands in her pockets and her elbows drawn back at almost 90 degree angles. “I noticed your fight with Kevin.”

“I don’t think anyone missed it,” Mike mutters, thinking with a bit of guilt about how he had aired his and Kevin’s fight so loudly. Then looks back up at her and says, at normal volume, “But don’t worry, we’ve worked it out.”

“Good,” Lauren says, but she still looks awkward. He’s not entirely sure why, but she answers his unspoken question a moment later when she says: “I talked to Mia about your relationship a few weeks ago. I mentioned my...hesitancy of it, because of its conflicts with the Samurai Code.”

“Technically both Antonio and I’s powers conflict with the Samurai Code, but continue,” Mike says automatically.

Lauren takes a deep breath. “To be completely honest, when we first picked you up from the Nighlok, I was unsure whether you would even be able to walk. The idea of you becoming a Ranger again didn’t even enter my mind.”

“Thanks,” Mike mutters, sarcasm coloring his tone. He’s not exactly sure what this has to do with his relationship with Kevin, but he’s sure she has a point she wants to make. Doesn’t mean he can’t be offended, though.

“But I’m very proud of your progress, Mike. Seeing what you’ve become, outside of what the Samurai Code dictates- it managed to open my mind a bit. Antonio was remarkable, yes, but he wasn’t raised in the Samurai Code. I know he swore himself to Jayden, not the Shiba House like the rest of you. His breaking of the Code was one thing. You, on the other hand- you grew up in our ways. You knew Samurai honor, the importance of tradition and dedication to our ways, and yet you still changed and evolved. Losing the way of the Green Ranger and deciding to become the White Ranger- that was something unheard of by the Code. You broke the Code, and it worked.”

“I did some thinking after Mia and I’s conversation, about all of this, and I realized that your and Kevin’s relationship, Antonio and Jayden’s- they may break the Code, but maybe the Code should be broken. Your and Antonio’s examples both strengthened the team, not weakened it. The world is changing, and maybe we should change with it.”

For a few moments, silence sits heavy between them. Then: “Wow,” Mike says, “I was not expecting that.”

Lauren raises an eyebrow. “Was it a good surprise?”

“The best,” Mike says honestly. “You’re our leader- I wanted you to be as accepting as Jayden is. I wanted you to understand. I wanted to know that you loved your brother and accepted the fact that Antonio is very likely to become your brother-in-law. I wanted to know that you didn’t feel wrong with two non-traditional Samurai Rangers on the team. And just now, everything that you told me- that was everything I wanted.

Before today, I respected you, but knowing that you won’t put the Code over the happiness and love of your team, that you recognize the Code’s flaws- that makes me _like_ you.”

Lauren smiles, a small, genuine thing. “I’ve never had someone say that before.”

Mike’s brow furrows. “Say what?”

She shrugs slightly, the tight line of her shoulders curving slightly. “That they liked me.”

Something in Mike’s heart hurts at that. He knows- the whole team knows- that Lauren was raised in isolation, that up until she met the team she’d never had a friend before in her life. But hearing her say something like that so casually, as if it’s just a natural occurrence- that’s striking. “Well, I do. And so does Jayden, definitely, and Antonio, and I’m pretty sure Mia. The rest of the team probably does as well.”

“I’ve never known that many people before in my life, much less had the opportunity to have them like me,” Lauren admits, and Mike’s heart breaks a little further.

“You can like us too, Lauren, if you’re comfortable with that.”

“I hope to be,” she says, “It just might take a little while to get used to your ways.”

“And that’s fine,” Mike says, “We can’t expect you to change everything you believe in so quickly.”

“Thank you for your patience,” Lauren says, giving a slight bow, and something of child Mike winces inside of him. Despite all the changes they’ve made, all the rules of the Code that they’ve broken, some traditions run deep. The idea of a Shiba bowing to an Akita, even in thanks- that is something incredibly antithetical to everything that was ingrained in his head growing up.

It seems as if Mike isn’t an entirely new kind of Samurai Ranger after all.

-

Without Kevin’s hovering and with Lauren’s increased level of trust in him, Mike starts to find his groove in his new color and new path. He learns to fight in his own right, regaining a trust in his teammate’s abilities to take care of themselves.

-

“Your fighting style has changed,” Emily says, entering the training area, and Mike pauses in slashing at the dummy to look at her. “It’s more fluid, kind of like Antonio’s but not quite.”

“More...serpentine, would you say?” Mike says with a grin.

“Actually, yeah,” Emily says.

“Thank the Snake Zord for that,” Mike says. “I've learned to fight like it moves in battle.”

“It’s certainly working,” Emily says.

“I’d have to second that,” Lauren says from her spot by the other dummy, where she’s paused her training. Mike looks over at her and finds her with a small, proud smile on her face. He smiles in return, content in finally having secured his team leader’s approval.

-

Jayden fights Dekker, as they always knew he would do, and he doesn’t fight alone. He’s saved by a strike from Kevin, who finally takes out Dekker. It’s a dishonorable move according to the Code, but they don’t exactly have much fondness for the Code anymore.

Mike’s pretty fucking proud of Kevin. The man he met the day they were summoned to be Rangers was so wrapped up in tradition and honor and the Code that he never would have thought of such a back-handed move as hitting a man from behind, but the Kevin standing before him today is not that man.

A year and a half ago, Dekker declared Kevin unfit to fight his ultimate duel with. He said he was too rigid in his ways, not creative enough to fight.

Today, Kevin was the one to strike the final winning blow in that duel. It’s only just.

-

The Sanzu River starts to flood their world, and the largest group of Moogers they have ever fought emerges with the water. Mike knows that this has to be their final battle- if they don’t turn back the Moogers now, it will all be for naught.

They are stronger than they’ve ever been. They are eight Rangers strong, with two Reds as well  as two non-core Rangers. No Samurai Ranger team has ever been that powerful before. If anyone can stop Xandred, it’s this team.

Mike believes in them.

-

They’ve taken down nearly all of the Moogers, and the Sanzu River levels have retreated at least a little bit. It’s actually easy to believe that they’ve succeeded, that they won’t have to fight Master Xandred-

But then Master Xandred enters the battle, and Mike freezes within his suit. Despite his months of training, his new Ranger powers, and his teammates at his side, he can’t help but remembers the feeling of the Sanzu River air clogging his throat, the torture the Nighloks put him through, the unending despair of dying in that tiny, dark cell.

Then he comes back to himself and he knows he has to charge into battle. He became the White Ranger for a reason. They have the Sealing Symbol- they'll defeat Master Xandred.

They have to.

-

Mike manages to stay that optimistic throughout the entire battle fighting Master Xandred, as he and his teammates keep Master Xandred away from Lauren as she completes the Sealing Symbol. He became the White Ranger to keep Master Xandred from doing any more damage, and he’s going to make it work.

And then the Sealing Symbol fails, Master Xandred emerging from the smoke only slightly singed, and Mike hasn’t felt something this terrifying since the moment Master Xandred said he was going to kill him.

“What’s with that white patch on his chest?” Mike asks, knowing all too well what Master Xandred really looks like. He spent months on his ship- he will never forget Master Xandred's appearance for as long as he lives. “I’ve never seen that before.”

“Dayu’s human side is what saved me,” Master Xandred says, and Mike remembers the ruthless half-Nighlok who set him free from the Sanzu River. He remembers her misery, her disdain for happiness, her disdain for him. Still, she helped him escape and he does owe her something for that.

Then Master Xandred blasts Lauren with his power and she’s sent to the ground, her arm breaking under her. Mike nearly runs to her, but then Master Xandred strikes them all with his air blasts, sending them to the ground.

Then Master Xandred escapes. He _escapes_ , free in their world, and Mike's world splinters.

-

They get back to the Shiba House, the team only DeMorphing once inside of the walls of the compound.

“We need to discuss how to defeat Xandred now that the Sealing Symbol didn’t work,” Lauren begins, cradling a bad arm, but Mike can’t concentrate on the speech of one of his leaders as he’s stuck. He can’t get himself to DeMorph. He can’t give up the only protection he has left against Master Xandred. He _can’t_ let himself get captured again. He can’t go back, can’t survive that-

“Mike,” Kevin says, voice stern, but Mike catches a familiar undercurrent of concern. Something’s unsettling Kevin. “Why aren't you DeMorphing?”

“I need the Power,” Mike says, trying not to scream. “I have to be strong, have to protect everyone from Master Xandred-”

“Master Xandred can't get you here in the Shiba House, Mike,” Kevin says. “You're safe here-”

“He got our parents here,” Mike says, “He killed my _father_. He-” Mike can't get any more words out. All he can imagine is Master Xandred getting here, capturing him again, killing Kevin-

“Mike,” Lauren says, but Mike can’t look away from Kevin. Kevin, who Master Xandred could kill so easily. “I order you to DeMorph. Staying connected to the Grid for too long can do permanent damage, you know that.”

Mike can barely breathe. He can feel the Sanzu River air clogging his throat. He has to protect himself, has to protect Kevin, can't let himself or anyone else get captured and tortured by the Nighlok or killed by Master Xandred.

If he stays morphed, no one can get hurt. The Green Ranger fell to Master Xandred- the White Ranger won't. It _can't_ fall-

“Mike!” He hears someone shouting, and Mike finds himself down on his knees, still morphed, with Kevin's hand on his shoulder. “Please, Mike, I know you can DeMorph. You're having a panic attack and you're feeling unsafe, but I know you. Remember what you told me- you can protect yourself. You're stronger than Master Xandred's hold on you. You just have to calm down, okay? Breathe with me.”

And so Mike does. He steadies his breaths, focusing on Kevin's, and tries to ignore the intruding thoughts. One, in. Two, out. Three, in. Four, out-

He DeMorphs, the White Ranger uniform and connection to the Power Grid sloughing off of his body and mind. In its place is just a shaking, all-too-fragile human form. His thin t-shirt, necklace, jeans, and boots feel like nothing compared to the armor he was just wearing.

Kevin reaches over and wraps Mike in a hug, warm arms surrounding Mike like a blanket, and it feels like some level of protection has been restored. “Oh thank god,” he mutters into Mike's ear. “I was so worried.”

Mike feels something wet on his cheeks and reaches up to find his face smeared with tears. “Oh my god,” Mike says, “I’m so sorry. I can’t be breaking down when we all need to be focusing.”

“You went through months of torture at the hands of Master Xandred,” Kevin says, “Being upset is understandable.”

“Having panic attacks and/or developing unhealthy coping mechanisms as a response to seeing a psychological trigger is completely normal,” Alicia says, and he blinks at her. She gives him a small, sad smile. “Duty pulled me away from my Spring Break of my first year of college. I was in an Intro to Psychology course.”

“And you never mentioned this before?” Mia asks, eyebrow raised, and Alicia shrugs.

“We spend every moment training to fight monsters or fighting said monsters,” Alicia says, “And Mike’s never had a breakdown like that before. No one here’s had a breakdown like that before.”

 _Not that Alicia could see, at least,_ Mike thinks but doesn’t say.

Mikes takes a deep breath. “Okay, then,” he says, to both Kevin and Alicia. He pushes himself off the ground, and Kevin rises with him. Kevin doesn’t let go, though, and Mike’s completely fine with that. The idea of Kevin letting go is not something Mike thinks he could handle for a few more minutes, at least.

He does feel a bit steadier once he's on his feet, though. It helps to feel, in some way, like he has some level of control.

"Let's go inside," Lauren says, and he looks over at her to see that she is staring at him, a look of concern in her eyes. "I think that Jayden and I have things we need to plan, and you all need to rest, and I need to get my arm looked at."

This is easily the most disjointed pattern Mike has ever heard Lauren speaking in. She's always so put together, always planning every word so carefully, as if she's afraid of the consequences- the failure of the Sealing Symbol must be rattling her nearly as badly as it's screwing with Mike's head. Makes sense- she's spent her entire life training to make this one thing succeed, and now it's blown up in their faces. Mike doesn't blame her for reacting like this. (It'd be kind of hypocritical if he did, after all, considering the fact that his breakdown was so much worse.)

They head into the dojo, where they find Mentor Ji waiting for them. Before he gets a chance to speak, a chance to remark on the devastated looks on their faces and the dirt coating their skin, Lauren says, "The Sealing Symbol only worked partially, Mentor Ji." 

Jayden picks up from there. “Lauren and I want the team to go get an hour of rest before we go any further,” he orders. “Fighting Xandred for the first time took a lot out of us, and we have to regain at least some of our strength before the final battle.”

Not even Kevin protests, instead putting a hand on Mike's back and leading them both to bed. Once there they both collapse on top of the sheets, bone-weary and drained.

Mike is exhausted, and falling asleep in Kevin’s arms is just about the easiest thing to do. Asleep, he doesn't have to worry about the world falling about around them. Instead, there is just the comfort of Kevin's arms and the momentary lack of nightmares.

-

They wake up an hour and a half later to the sounds of the alarms going off. They immediately jump out of bed, making sure their Morphers are hanging from their belts before running into the main dojo. There, they find Lauren with a sling around her arm, sitting at her usual spot at the head of the table next to Jayden. Mia, Alicia, Emily, and Antonio are all in the room, looking as dirty and exhausted as they did before but just a little bit refreshed in their stubborness and drive to destroy Xandred. (Or maybe that's just Mike projecting. He can't tell, and he doesn't much care.)

"Xandred and another army of moogers has been sighted in the middle of the city," Mentor Ji says, examining the map that's already pulled up on the main table. "Jayden and Lauren's plan of using brute force on Xandred's new vulnerable spot is going to have to work." Mentor looks over at Mike, a look of concern on his face, and Mike can't take it.

“I can fight in this battle,” Mike instantly insists. He can't let what happened earlier be taken as a sign of weakness or as an indication he can be pulled off the team. Not when the final battle's about to happen, not when he's spent so long trying to make himself into a new kind of Ranger that can help take down the monster who made his life a living hell. “I'm not weak.”

“We know you're not,” Jayden says, “And we definitely need you in battle.”

“I, on the other hand,” Lauren says, gesturing with her good hand to her injured one, “cannot fight with you. My arm is too injured, and I am too exhausted from using the Sealing Symbol. I can't be up to strength soon enough. I will contribute my Symbol power, but I can't morph.”

“That will be enough,” Mentor Ji says, and Jayden nods. 

“I will be the leader for this final battle,” Jayden says, and it’s been so long since Jayden has been their sole leader Mike can barely remember it. He wonders if they’ll be enough without Lauren, without the full strength of their team.

They’ll be enough. They have to.

-

In the end, the battle to finally defeat Master Xandred isn't some terrifying boss battle. It's not easy, by any means, but it's like defeating a Nighlok with heightened strength and endurance rather than the Lord of All Misery. It takes all of the Rangers' skills, but he goes down as inevitably as all Nighlok do.

Master Xandred falls to Jayden's final strike and Mike DeMorphs. He goes running to Kevin, grabbing him and slamming their lips together. “He’s gone for good,” Mike says in between kisses, “I’m never letting you go.”

Kevin is just as desperate. He clutches Mike's arms, pulling their bodies together. They cleave together, leaving no room between their clothing. Their war is over now- Master Xandred can never hurt either of them ever again.

“Let's go on a date, okay?” Mike says with a confident grin.

“What makes you think I'd say yes?” Kevin asks, not removing his hands from Mike's arms. After nearly dying, it's really hard to find the desire to sever physical contact from each other.

“The war's over, Master Xandred is finished, and we've been making out and cuddling for weeks,” Mike says. “I'd take that as a million good reasons to say yes.”

“I only counted four,” Kevin says with a teasing smile, and Mike rolls his eyes.

“Kiss me again, you hair-splitting, tradition-loving nerd,” Mike says.

“ _Your_ nerd,” Kevin says, but then happily obliges.

 -

They get back to Shiba House compound and find Lauren standing at the entrance to the dojo, arm still in that sling. Her expression is almost unreadable, in the way it used to be when he first met her and didn't know what to do with the fact that Jayden had been replaced with some random girl in a red-and-white striped shirt and the stiffest posture he'd ever seen. 

Lauren's gaze flits between Jayden and Mia, Mike and Antonio, like she doesn't know who to greet first. 

In the end Mia's the first to step forward. She takes a few slow steps toward Lauren, and then breaks into a run that ends with her wrapping the Shiba Heir in a tight hug. "We did it!" Mia shouts, and Mike's unsure how Lauren's gonna respond. Is she going to offer a stiff "thanks," going to reject Mia's easy affection, going to just stand there? Lauren's changed a lot since Mike first met her, but how far is she-?

And then, Mike hears a completely unfamiliar sound- that of Lauren Shiba's laughter. She's clutching onto Mia just as tightly as Mia is holding her, clear, bell-like laughter ringing out over all of the compound. "That we did," she says, pressing her lips into Mia's hair.

Mike looks around to find Antonio with his arm around Jayden's shoulders, Jayden's arm around Antonio's waist as they lean into each other's sides. Jayden is smiling that smile that, up until now, Mike has only seen as a direct result of something Antonio's done.

Emily's smile is bright and so is Alicia's. Mike's happy that his cousin and one of his best friends are happy, that this war didn't completely destroy either of their optimistic spirits.

it seems like this war may have left its damage, but the family it created is one that is going to last.

"Things are looking up," Kevin says, leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to Mike's cheek.

Mike looks back at Kevin. He knows, logically, that things aren't going to fix themselves just because Master Xandred is gone. Nightmares and bad memories don't just go away like that. Panic attacks don't just go away because the monster who caused them is dead.

But their war is over. Things can only get better now that they aren't fearing for their lives on a regular basis. Antonio can run that fishing business of his, Emily can check on her sister and then  go on all the world trips she wants, Alicia can go back to school, Mia can learn to cook (hopefully), Lauren and Jayden can be the normal people they never got the chance to be, and Kevin can go to the Olympics.

And Mike? Fuck if he knows what he's going to do, only that it's going to be awesome. With a great boyfriend by his side and a family of now ex-Power Rangers to call on if he ever needs help, how could be do anything but be great?

"Yeah," Mike says, grabbing Kevin's hand and dragging him toward the dojo for a snack- he's fucking starving after the battle- and into the future. "Things are going to be great."

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this and half of an epilogue in three days, then realized that the story would function better as two one-shots because the "cameos" got a lot bigger and Mike kept developing as a character and then the one-year reunion for the Samurai Team started acquiring a lot of Rangers from other teams because they became psuedo-mentors, therapists, or significant others for various Samurai Rangers and then Mike became a teacher and, well, I wanted to at least get this posted soon. Hope you all liked this story, because there will be a sequel!
> 
> (Also, comments are like life blood to writers. Please comment, they give me validation and motivation to actually finish and post the sequel!)


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